Father's Day by Elizabeth Gilbert

Bookmarking this post from Elizabeth Gilbert on Father's Day.    Everything I aspire to be as a parent: unconditional love.   

In other words: The beginning of love is the will to let those we love be perfectly themselves, the resolution not to twist them to fit our own image. If in loving them we do not love what they are, but only their potential likeness to ourselves, then we do not love them: we only love the reflection of ourselves we find in them.  Thomas Menton

Dear Ones:

In honor of Father’s Day, I want to explain the supreme beauty behind this little note that my Dad left in my home a few weeks ago.

First of all, a little about my Dad. He’s a true conservative by nature; a lifelong Republican:, a veteran; an engineer; a farmer; married to the same woman for over 50 years; was employed by the same company for his entire career; and is still living in the same house that he bought in 1973.

By contrast, please consider his daughter, me: A liberal, twice-divorced creative type; a wide-ranging spiritual seeker who regularly visits psychics and shamans; a follow-your-heart sort of gal, who announced to her family last year that she was in love with a woman; and — most of all — someone who cannot stay STILL.

By actual count, in the last 20 years I have lived in 12 different homes. (This doesn’t include places where I have “stayed”; I’m just counting the places where my name was on the actual lease or deed.)

What do you do if you are a man like my father, and you end up with a daughter like this? Well, if you are John Gilbert, you just love her. That’s it. You don’t need to understand her. You don’t need to change her. You just love her.

And when your daughter invites you to come visit the TWELFTH domicile she’s inhabited in the last two decades (a 600 square-foot apartment this time, by the way, when she used to live in a fancy five bedroom house on the top of a hill)....how do you react? Well, obviously you leave her a note at the end of your visit that says: “LOVE THE APT. THE BEST YET.”

Fathers of the world, take a lesson from my Dad: THIS is how to love your children. Because even though I am almost 50 years old, I will always be my father’s child, and the only thing I need to know is that I’m always OK in his eyes.

Thank you, Dad, for never needing me to be anything other than what I am, to earn your affection. I return the favor by loving you exactly as YOU are. Which is easy, because you are perfect.❤️ LG
(PS: And thanks for loving my apartment, Dad! I love it too)